Only the lonely can play

I'd never heard of them till a month ago, I'd never seen them till 17 hours ago; but last night, Wilco became a band that rocked my world. For two-half hours, it seemed as if the world outside became inconsequential as Jude and I, together with the Hill Auditorium full of people, were swept up in one band's, or I would like to think one man's journey through purgatory, recovery and absolution.

What I know of Wilco's history I know from Jude, and now some things I found out from various websites. Lead singer Jeff Tweedy only recently recovered from a substance abuse problem and had been in rehab for a while. Having experienced record contract controversies, band members leaving him, a nervous breakdown and drug rehab, this man is no stranger to pain, and it shows. While clearly a gifted songwriter, much of last night's performance was engulfed by the Strum und Drang of the guitars and drums. The 12-minute long "Spiders (Kidsmoke)", though a showcase for drummer Glenn Kotche's virtuosity (and awesome stamina), was also I felt, the method behind Tweedy's madness. Through the seemingly chaotic track, one line stands out: "It's good to be alone"; and in "Handshake Drugs", he sings over and over, "I felt like a clown; I looked like someone I used to know...Exactly what do you want me to be?" This is not a man who rants and raves from hollow angst- it's a questioning of where and how he was where he was, and the uncertainty of this place at which he has arrived.

The difference between watching the band live and listening to them is the visual impact of them on stage. This is clearly a band that has seriously gotten a tight act together. They were technically skillful and all of them obviously enjoy perfoming which added to the already electrifying mood. It was one of the best concerts I've ever been to; in fact, critics are calling them one of the best bands in the world right now. I haven't heard the previous albums which Tweedy released with a different set of band members, but according to Jude, this present crew has been able to recreate the studio sound of earlier tracks to a T. And yet Tweedy seemed somehow apart from them, detached almost. Oh he was engaged in the performance, there's not doubt about that; but there was also the sense that he was having a private experience of his own. Through the songs and the singing, there were ghosts to exorcize and demons to vanquish. Last night, lyrics weren't just words for Tweedy- they were a secular prayer to some external god, seeking catharsis, redemption and hopefully peace. There could have been hundreds of people in the auditorium, but for Jeff Tweedy, it was a road to recovery he was walking alone.

"Be not so nervous
Be not so frail
Be not so nervous
Be not so frail
Be not so sorry
For what you have done"

- Wilco, "Be Not So Fearful"


WILCO::Jeff Tweedy (lead singer-guitarist)::John Stirratt (bass)::Glenn Kotche (drums)::Mikael Jorgensen (keyboards)::Pat Sansone (keyboards and guitar)::Nels Cline (guitar)