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Friday, January 19, 2007

Misfortune cookie

For everyone who's ever gotten an incomprehensible fortune cookie, you've never gotten it this bad. Fortune cookie wisdom from the world's cruelest Chinese restaurants:

Someone will find great prosperity and happiness by stealing your identity.

I'm from the free market and I'm here to help you

You are a person with grave misgivings. Trust these feelings. Lucky numbers: none

If you still think it's funny to add "...in bed" to the end of a fortune, you'll have plenty of time alone.

You will embark on a long journey that will become tragically short.

Yesterday was the luckiest day of your life.

Keeping fortunes in your wallet does not make them come true.

You should not have hit "reply to all"

Someday this will all seem funny. Oh, not to you. Did you think we meant to you?

DNA testing holds surprises for you

Great things are coming your way. Unfortunately, one of them arrives while you are crossing the street.

You have great insights about matters of little consequence.

[From Salon.com]

What's your most memorable fortune?

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